Facebook Status Updates

CRITICAL PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT FROM AUNT SLUGGER

I know it's been a while since your Aunt Slugger has posted, and I owe you all an apology for that, but there are more pressing matters at hand. I saw something today that I just couldn't let go.

Today on Facebook, multiple people posted the following status update, word for word:

"If you voted for Obama to prove your not a racist, this time you better vote for someone else to prove your not an idiot!"

I will pause for a moment while you re-read that. Take your time.

Are you done? All right. People, please read this public service announcement VERY, VERY CAREFULLY.

If you are going to call someone an idiot in a Facebook status update, you should be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN THAT YOU PROOFREAD BEFORE YOU CLICK "POST." Do you get what I'm saying? Because calling someone an idiot while SIMULTANEOUSLY MISSPELLING WORDS is both ironic and tragic. (It's also funny, but not for you. Just for the rest of us.)

And as a side note, did anyone vote for Obama to prove he or she was not a racist? The implication here is that Obama received an absolute boatload of votes from people who were standing alone in a voting booth, overcome with concern about what the voting machine thought about their level of racial tolerance. Is that why he won? Not because he ran a better campaign or because voters liked his platform better? But because American voters, the same American voters who have sustained "The Jersey Shore" through four seasons, were suddenly consumed with appearances? Yes, that explains it.

So please, readers, the next time you call someone an idiot, check you're spelling.